A Larger Zombie

Sweet Childhood Time Travel & Magic.

My childhood pictures are made of sweet desire to discover flying Ginny pigs’ magic and happy chocolate rain dreams. I could easily find them doing art and often the results were unpredictable.

I found my old pictures in worse condition than I expected to. They were drawn with a thick layer of gouache that now crumbles and loses its brightness. My little heavy thick things; I used a package of gouache for each. -)))
I also notice how I used to put my fingerprints on them instead of a signature, haha.
I took photos of these pictures (they’re quite large) and added some brightness in Photoshop. Now I can rest assured they’re safe. I’m glad they’ve survived; it feels like traveling in time. That’s what magic is. -))
So, here we go.

Back in school I learned about how Napoleon’s armies invaded Moscow and burned it. It appeared in my mind burning so bright, like if I’d been there in 1812.

This unfinished picture has a bird-ship flying into infinity. I’d probably jump into it. -) And I guess that little angel was inspired by Sistine Chapel ceiling.

Another unfinished picture. I remember I had no brushes. Fingers saved me but when I finally found the brushes I’d lost my inspiration.

Religious “postcard”… of a meter in size. Faceless people. -)) Portraits didn’t bring me as much joy back then as they do now. >_>
I wanted to see this cathedral so much that I drew it in detail and kept imagining it from different sides. That dream came true just about 10 years later.

This weirdness -))) is something I can’t even explain. I guess it was drawn for Christmas.

My first Real still life. I think I wanted to put all that was reflected into it. That brown-beige spot must be my reflection.

Lalala.

About A Larger Zombie.

When I only started this blog I wanted it to be a serious philosophical thing. But I’m not a philosopher and it would sound kind of “out of space” here. Later on I wanted to devote this blog to comics. But my comics speak for themselves.
Soooooooo…
This blog is just “A Larger Zombie” – to blah-blah about anything I’m thinking of. And find interesting. And funny. And la. It’s not serious. That’s how this blog got its name. It’s crazy like me.
I’ve been in search of my <_< "identity" >_> for quite a while. I love doing art or better to say -> I need it a looot. It feels like if I don’t do it I’m gonna explode to thousands of Ari Mazes. It wouldn’t feel as great as it sounds, ahhahah.
It’s a need. Sometimes I keep thinking what I want my art to be like instead of just doing how I feel. I have ideas and so many ways to make them come true – too many ways to choose one. So I stay sitting and staring into my window unable to decide. -))
Perfectly, I’d like to “combine a lot in one”. Let it be music, theater, literature, illustration, animation. Something in me screams “Yaaay!! Hey, do it all now!” and I go dizzy. I know that to start I choose something one. It’s illustration. Done some stuff for gallery. And as some have guessed, my comics are a way to combine illustration, literature (hehe…) aaand some music (hehehehehe!). Experiments are fun.

For now enjoy my new madness.

11.11.11

Superstitions…

11.11.11 (11.11.2011 to be exact) -) – is this day special?

Or is it going to be?

The date is unusual, indeed. And I need to live a 100 of years more to see a date like this (even better: 11.11.2111). It’s a comfortable number for some historical event – whatever it is. Some people are going to choose it to make wishes, to get married or to do something they’ve always wanted to but have been afraid of doing.

…The day-reason to do something special. An “excuse” to call, to hug, to appear out of doom or to forget the rules… It could be the day full of disasters or happy meetings or whatever someone chooses.

But for me today is just a reason to write this blog post.

<_< I can't see beyond the snowfall that's closing my window view. >_>

I was superstitious when I was a kid. I’d turn around 3 times each time I saw a black cat crossing my way. Unlike in the UK where a black cat is luck, it’s believed to bring troubles by crossing your way in Russia, for example. And I bet it’s not because Russian black cats are special in a way. They’re not.
A cat would “determine” my day and I’d honestly hate it and try to scare it away before its paws touch my path. -)) But a scared cat would just cross my way even faster!
Too bad, 2 black cats lived beside my house and school…

I’d put a book before exams beneath my pillow and believe the knowledge would stay better in my mind. I couldn’t believe it long… Nothing is better than learning awake.
The childhood beliefs list can go on and on…

But in spite of all these superstitions and pointless beliefs, I’ve noticed one regularity: a day usually goes just like it starts. When I see something totally weird once I wake up or leave home – the day is all weird.

Once, walking outside at 6am I saw a man throwing a toilet bowl away (what on earth was he doing so early in the dark of cold morning?). That left me O_o for a while. The day was crazy and full of unpredictability.

…one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one…

The saddest Halloween story.

One of those things I wanted so much in my childhood was… Halloween. It’s just not in the list of Russian holidays!
No chance to dress as a creepy creeper and do crazy things having an excuse.
No chance to ask for sweets and be allowed to perform whatever I like.
No chance to visit people who wait for creepers.
No chance to have fun and forget who “you are” for a while and become a zombie…
It feels like I missed something once I watch American movies where kids enjoy Halloween.

But still, each time this day comes I feel like doing something crazy and special. Sometimes people do theme parties here but none of them feel right to me.

For example, there was a Halloween party in my school when I was 12. It was the first and the last one, as far as I know. And I was looking forward to it so much. Ohhh… I couldn’t even sleep. I believed it would be one of the best artistic and fun days in my life.
I designed my black evil cloak with its edges torn (so the wind would flap it even more “evilly”). Then it took me a day of hard work to draw a happy smiling skeleton on its back. I drew each bone in detail so it would look realistic. So it did.
The last part was my hair and face. I made a few dozens of small braids that were supposed to be snakes coming out of my head (buahhahah). And black paint on my face: around my eyes and mouth – that made me look like a bat. An evil bat in a happy skeleton cloak with baby-snakes coming out of her head…

I was brought to school at 6pm and then I chose to be someone else. Someone new and crazy. Probably, someone, who wouldn’t be recognized!

They promised a party and a dressing contest days before. Some prizes too.

I opened the doors and…

Everyone was dressed the usual wayaaaah!!

It looked like a typical day at school excerpt it was evening time. I thought that may be they had their stuff to change later to be ready for the contest.
But nothing was changing, except music played once, there were a few games… not much fun.
And my classmates were all like: “WHAT the hell are you?!”.
At least, my madness was justified by the “party”.
I said I was “that thing with snakes on her head”.

…That’s why Halloween isn’t really here.

Out Of The Fog.

Blah blah… coming out of the fog. -))))
It took me a while to return to the work I really love, to my dream. Nothing else can ever make me as happy as something I enjoy doing so much. I keep thinking why *whatever that is* keeps pushing me away from it. And I come to conclusion that may be I don’t put enough effort into it. -_______________-”

Many hugs to those who’re waiting for the new comics. But I’m still having a break with their updates. Don’t let it upset you because I’m unpredictible enough even for myself: new arts can flood these fields anytime … And after another period of experiments I’m updating my gallery. -)) So, check it out and have fun!

A small invasion on my bed.

Ahhhhahaha…